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Los Angeles

The madness begins

sunny 26 °C

Sadly it was soon time for us to leave Costa Mesa and head into the big sprawling mess of LA... Sam was (over) confident that we would see celebrities at every corner, Lindsay Lohan in the gutter, and Britney getting out of a car with no undies, so with a great amount of anticipation we headed to the hire car place to pick up our transportation.

The decision to drive has been long debated, as my abilities to drive on the wrong side of the road were compared by some to Manlys ability to win a game... ie not good. Confident i could prove the critics wrong, we headed to John Wayne Airport. (yes they named the airport after John Wayne. God Bless America)

We were handed the keys to a brand spanking new silver Mazda 3, which we christened Gordon.. a brother for Jules’ beloved Ruby. Hesitantly backing out of the rental car place, we set off... Quiet streets soon turned to smog filled 28 lane highways filled with abusive angry rush hour commuters...

We made it off the freeway and turned onto Famed Hollywood Boulevard.. The hookers were out in force, the homeless lined the street, and the street performers persisted with their bad batman impressions... Ah it was good to be there amongst the weirdos..... We parked Gordon and walked to the nearest coffee shop, across the road from the famous Manns Chinese Theatre... We sat down and realised we were skint, so i went to the ATM. As i was getting money out, a fight broke out right behind me on the sidewalk, two guys just hooking into each other in broad daylight, 11 in the morning, chicks screaming, it was all happening. This understandably surprised us, but a few more days in the city would see us become used to such shenanigans.. Everything in LA is bigger, better and badder than anywhere we’ve been... Instead of arguing, they fight.. Instead of walking, they strut... instead of normal coffee cups, they’re buckets, and instead of normal houses, they’re ridiculous over the top mansions.... Believe me, i was about to find this out first hand.....

After dropping our gear off at the crusty motel 6 on Hollywood and Vine, we did what Sam had been itching to do for weeks.. stalk some celebs. We picked up the mandatory ‘Map to the Stars homes’, fired Gordon up, and headed into the hills... First stop - Miss L. Lohan. Apparently she lived in some huge block of apartments, along with Mathew Perry and Cher... Expecting some beautifully landscaped condos with fountains flowing with champagne, and golden gates with diamond handles, we were bitterly disappointed to find a pretty b grade building.... Trust Lohan to have no class.

It got better though, as we decided to stalk some other members of Friends... Jennifer Anistons hedge looks a bit worse for wear after Sam camped in it for half an hour, and im pretty sure Courtney Cox has taken out a restraining order.... Not to mention Nicholas Cage, Jennifer Lopez and Angelina Jolie.. Finally though we got to do something i wanted to do.. go to the Playboy Mansion! Well, stop on the street outside the playboy mansion, and gaze longingly inside....
After putting about 100 miles on Gordons clock, we headed up into the hills, and straight to the big HOLLYWOOD sign... The view was amazing and the size of LA incredible.... We still had a bit of time so we drove to Bel Air and cruised down Rodeo Drive...Sam hanging her head out the window like a hungry dog as we passed stores that only multi billionaires would ever enter.... Somehow I managed to get out with my credit rating still intact.... By then though it was time to get some rest, as we had a big day battling the crowds tomorrow, at Universal Studios....

After the sheer awesomeness of Disneyland, we headed to Universal with a fair amount of anticipation... Unlike Disneyland, we thankfully managed to arrive on a day where only half the population of California were there, so we only had to wait several hours to get in... We battled our way though waves of over stimulated kids and jumped on the tour of the movie lot, which took us through the backlots and sets used in a ton of movies...It was actually pretty interesting how they put it all together.. After that though we got down to the serious business of going on as many rides as we can, while stuffing ourselves with junk food (or health food, in Sams case)... The highlight though was definitely lining up for photos with various characters, while being at least 12 years older than anyone else in the line... hmmm
With our blood sugar levels through the roof, we soon crashed out, which was a good thing, seeing as the next day we had a serious drive on our hands... Up the US101 to San Francisco...

Posted by willandsam 20:44 Archived in USA Tagged educational

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Comments

Oh William...your playing with fire with the Dennis contingent throwing in a Manly joke....operate with caution my friend...:)

by Julesy

I went to the gates of the playboy mansion too!. And the guy on the intercom started talking to me! Asked if i was an actor. Looking back i should have just said yes, ditched the girlfriend and partied with the bunnies.

by Mike_d

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